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我记得那是在来中国后不久,我应邀到一个中国朋友家去吃饭,他们家请我去吃顿"家常便饭",我很高兴地接受了邀请。在知道了那天晚餐不是很正式之后,我就松了一口气。 he family greeted me very warmly when I arrived at their home. After talking for about twenty minutes, they suggested that we move to the dinner table. Only then did I realize the magnitude of their effort: there were so many dishes on the table that I couldn't see the table itself. For this "ordinary home-cooked meal," the family had prepared about fifteen separate dishes! 当我到了她家时,全家人热情地招呼我,在谈了约20分钟后,他们提议坐到餐桌前。到那时我才知道了他们所准备的规模。桌上摆了那么多的菜,我都看不见桌面了。为了这顿"家常便饭"他们做了15个菜。 As we sat down to eat, my friend's mother said, "Unfortunately, there's not very much here; this is just an ordinary dinner." Even having spent little time in China, it was clear that the family had gone to considerable effort in preparing this feast. I doubted that this would truly be considered an "ordinary home-cooked meal" in any country. I thought, in the United States, if someone had put this type of effort into a meal, they would surely have proudly said something like "These dishes are my specialties; my mother taught me how to make them. I spent just about all day working on them so you could taste the real thing! I sure hope you enjoy the meal." For Americans, this kind of pride shows that the host took the guest seriously and put his or her best effort into the meal; it's their way of showing respect for the guest. In China, this type of attitude would generally be considered boastful and improper. 当我们坐下来准备进餐时,朋友的妈妈说:"真是不巧,菜不多,只是个便饭"。虽然到中国时间不长,但我很清楚这一家子花费了相当大的力量来准备这顿饭。我想,在任何一个国家,都不会真的认为这是一顿"家常便饭"吧?在美国,如果谁下了这么大功夫准备饭菜,他一定自豪地说上些"这些菜是我的拿手菜,我妈妈教的我,我花费了一整天准备它们,你们才尝到了真正的好味道,我希望你们吃得高兴"这样的话。对于美国人来说,这类的"自夸"表明了主人很看重客人,并且尽了全力来准备饭菜。这是对客人表示尊重的一种方式。而在中国,这样做会被人认为爱夸耀,很不合适。 As I began to eat, members of the family all said to me, "Just have what you like; help yourself." At the same time, however, they continued to give me some of every dish. Everything was delicious, to be sure. But there were three or four dishes I particularly liked. I tended to eat more of those. For the other dishes, I finished whatever the family gave to me, even when I didn't want any more. Each time I did, though, the family would give me more, thinking that by eating all of a dish, I was indicating that I wanted to continue eating that dish. 当我开始吃饭时,全家人都对我说:"想吃什么就吃什么,别客气。" 可一边说着,他们又接二连三地给我夹每个盘子里的菜。 的确,每道菜都很好吃,但有三四个菜我特别喜欢,想多吃点,不过对于夹给我的别的菜,也都吃了,即使我不想再吃,然而,每次我吃完后,这家人就又给我添上,他们以为,只要我吃完了什么菜,就意味着还想吃这道菜。 Moreover, every time we had nearly finished a dish, they replenished it from the kitchen. I explained that in the United States, "seeing the bottom" of all the plates is the ideal ending to a meal; it means that the guest has thoroughly enjoyed the meal. Clearly, in China "seeing the bottom" of a dish is a sign that the hosts have not prepared enough. 而且,每当一道菜要吃光时,他们又去厨房满上。我告诉他们,在美国,所有的盘子见了底,是最理想的结果,它意味着客人非常喜欢这顿饭。而在中国,"见底"则标志着主人准备得不充足。 
那顿饭留给我深深的印象。在中国度过了三年后,我已经习惯了中国人好客的独特方式,虽然美国人和中国人都很热情好客,但却以非常不同的方式表达他们的热情。
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