目 录 上一节 下一节 
她静静地把克利福的门打开了，克利福正坐在床上，他的床桌的打字机推在一边。守猎人站在床边等着，佛萝茜跑了进来，梅乐士的头部和眼睛做了个轻轻的姿势叫它到门外夫，它才溜了出来。 'Oh, good morning, Clifford!' Connie said. 'I didn't know you were busy.' Then she looked at the keeper, saying good morning to him. He murmured his reply, looking at her as if vaguely. But she felt a whiff of passion touch her, from his mere presence. " 呀，早安，克利福！"康妮说，"我不知道你们有事呢。"然后她望着守猎人，向他道了早安。他摸棱地望着她，低、声地回答着。但是仅仅他的现在，已使她觉得一种热情之浪荡到她身上来了。 'Did I interrupt you, Clifford? I'm sorry.' " 我打扰了你们吗，克利福？真对不起。" 'No, it's nothing of any importance.' " 不，那是毫无紧要的事。" She slipped out of the room again, and up to the blue boudoir on the first floor. She sat in the window, and saw him go down the drive, with his curious, silent motion, effaced. He had a natural sort of quiet distinction, an aloof pride, and also a certain look of frailty. A hireling! One of Clifford's hirelings! 'The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves, that we are underlings.' 她重新走出门来，到第一层楼上的蓝色梳妆室里去，她坐在窗前，望着他那种奇异的、静默的形态向那大路下去。他有着一种自然缄默的高贵，一种冷淡的骄傲，和某种弱不禁风的神气。一个雇工！一个克利福的雇工！"亲爱的布鲁图斯哟，不要埋怨我们的昨辰不烘照，如果我们侈共一等，那是我们自己的过错呵。" 
他是不是低人一等呢？他是不是？他那一方面又觉得他怎样呢？那是太阳光耀的一天，康妮在花园里工作着，波太太帮着她。为了一种什么缘故，这两个女人，给人类间存在着一种不可解的同情之潮所溶台了，她们把麝香石竹系在栓子上，她们种着一些夏季的小植物，这种工作她们俩都喜欢的。康妮尤其觉得把小植物的嫩根播入轻松的黑土里，再把它们轻轻埋好，是一种快乐的事，在这春日的早晨，她觉得子宫的深处在颤动着。仿佛阳光照了它，而使它快活起来似的。 'It is many years since you lost your husband?' she said to Mrs Bolton as she took up another little plant and laid it in its hole. " 你丈夫过世好多年了罢？"她一边对波太太说，一边拿起了一根小植物放在泥穴里。 'Twenty-three!' said Mrs Bolton, as she carefully separated the young columbines into single plants. 'Twenty-three years since they brought him home.' " 二十三年了！"波太太一边说，一边小心地把楼斗菜一一分开。"自从他们把他带回家里到现在。有二十三年了。" Connie's heart gave a lurch, at the terrible finality of it. 'Brought him home!' " 康妮听了这"带回家里"的可怖的结局，心里不禁吓了一跳。 'Why did he get killed, do you think?' she asked. 'He was happy with you?'" 你以为她是为什么遭难的？"她问道。"他生前和你快乐么？" 
这是妇人与妇人间的一个问题，波太太用她的手背，把垂在脸上的一撮头发拂了开去。 'I don't know, my Lady! He sort of wouldn't give in to things: he wouldn't really go with the rest. And then he hated ducking his head for anything on earth. A sort of obstinacy, that gets itself killed. You see he didn't really care. I lay it down to the pit. He ought never to have been down pit. But his dad made him go down, as a lad; and then, when you're over twenty, it's not very easy to come out.' " 我不晓得，夫人！他是一种不屈不挠的人；并且不愿与他人同道的，那是一种致命的固执性：宁死而不愿低头，你知道，他对什么都是漠然，我认为那是矿坑的罪过。他原就不应该到矿坑里做工的。但是他还小的时候，他的父亲便强迫他到矿坑里做工。这一来，当你过了二十岁时，那是不太容易改行的了。" 'Did he say he hated it?' " 他曾说过他讨厌到矿坑里做工么？" 'Oh no! Never! He never said he hated anything. He just made a funny face. He was one of those who wouldn't take care: like some of the first lads as went off so blithe to the war and got killed right away. He wasn't really wezzle-brained. But he wouldn't care. I used to say to him: "You care for nought nor nobody!" But he did! The way he sat when my first baby was born, motionless, and the sort of fatal eyes he looked at me with, when it was over! I had a bad time, but I had to comfort him. "It's all right, lad, it's all right!" I said to him. And he gave me a look, and that funny sort of smile. He never said anything. But I don't believe he had any right pleasure with me at nights after; he'd never really let himself go. I used to say to him: Oh, let thysen go, lad!---I'd talk broad to him sometimes. And he said nothing. But he wouldn't let himself go, or he couldn't. He didn't want me to have any more children. I always blamed his mother, for letting him in th' room. He'd no right t'ave been there. Men makes so much more of things than they should, once they start brooding.' " 呵。不！从来没有说过！他是从来不说他厌恶什么的"他只露着难看的面色罢了。他是那些粗心大意的人之一；好象大战开始的时候，那些第一批狂欢赴战，立刻阵亡的青年们一样他的头脑不是不清醒。就是什么都漠然。我常对他说：'您下对什么漠然。谁也不管！但这不是真的！呵。当我生第一胎孩子时，他那一动不动的静默着的神气。和孩子生过后，他望着我的那种凄惨的眼睛！那时我受了不小的苦痛。但是我得去安慰他。我对他说：'不要紧的，亲爱的，不要紧的！'他望着我，怪的道笑着。他从来不说什么的，但我相信从此以后，他在夜里和我再也没有什么真正乐趣了；他再也不您意任性了。我常对他说：'呵。亲爱的。让您自己任性点罢！'……我有时是要对他说这种粗的话的。他却不说什么，池总是不愿让他自己任性时儿，也许他不能罢。他不愿我再有孩子了，我常常埋怨他的母亲。她不该让他进产房里来的。他不应到那里去的。男子们的旦熟思起来的时候，是要把一切事情都张大起来着。" 'Did he mind so much?' said Connie in wonder. " 那对他有这么大的影响么？"康妮惊愕地说。 
是的。那种生产的苦痛。他是不能认为天然的。那把他夫妇之爱中所应得的乐趣都糟塌了。我对他说：'要是我自己都不介意，为什么你要介意？那是我的事情呢！……'他中回答道："那是不公道的！" 'Perhaps he was too sensitive,' said Connie. " 也许他是个太易感动的人吧。"康妮说。 'That's it! When you come to know men, that's how they are: too sensitive in the wrong place. And I believe, unbeknown to himself he hated the pit, just hated it. He looked so quiet when he was dead, as if he'd got free. He was such a nice-looking lad. It just broke my heart to see him, so still and pure looking, as if he'd wanted to die. Oh, it broke my heart, that did. But it was the pit.' " 对了！当你认识了男子的时候，你便知道他们在不该感动的地方。便太易感动了。我相信，连他自己也不晓得他是痛恨矿坑的，恨得入骨的，他死后的脸容是那么安静。仿佛他是被解救了似的。他生前是很漂亮的一个青年！当我看见他那么安泰。那么纯洁的样子，仿佛是他自己愿意死似的。我的心都碎了。唉！真的，那使我的心都碎了。但是那是矿坑的罪过。" She wept a few bitter tears, and Connie wept more. It was a warm spring day, with a perfume of earth and of yellow flowers, many things rising to bud, and the garden still with the very sap of sunshine. 说着，她流了几滴伤心泪。康妮却哭得比她更厉害。那天是个温暖的春日。空中浮荡着与黄花的香馨，许多东西在萌牙，阳光的精华充满着肃静的园里。 'It must have been terrible for you!' said Connie. " 你一定难过极了！"康妮说。 
阿夫人！起初我还不太明白呢，我只能反复地哭着说：'我的人哟，为什么你要离开我！……'我再也找不着其他的话说。但是我总觉得他会回来的。" 'But he didn't want to leave you,' said Connie. " 但是那并不是他要离开你呢。"康妮说。 'Oh no, my Lady! That was only my silly cry. And I kept expecting him back. Especially at nights. I kept waking up thinking: Why he's not in bed with me!---It was as if my feelings wouldn't believe he'd gone. I just felt he'd have to come back and lie against me, so I could feel him with me. That was all I wanted, to feel him there with me, warm. And it took me a thousand shocks before I knew he wouldn't come back, it took me years.' " 是的，夫人！那不过是我哭着时说的傻话，我继续地希望着他会回来的。尤其是在夜里，我眼不交睫地想着，为什么他不在这床上？……仿佛我的感觉不容我相信他是死了似的。我只觉得池是定要回来的。回来假紧着我躺着，使我可以觉得他是和我在一起，我唯一所希望的，便是感觉着他温暖暖地和我在一起。唉！不知道经过了多少次的捻，经过了多少年。我才明白他不会回来了！" 'The touch of him,' said Connie. " 和他的肉体的接触不会回来了。"康妮说。 'That's it, my Lady, the touch of him! I've never got over it to this day, and never shall. And if there's a heaven above, he'll be there, and will lie up against me so I can sleep.' " 对啦。夫人！和他的肉体的接触！直至今日。我还忘不了，而且永久也忘不了的。假如上面有天的话，他将在那儿。他将假紧着我躺着，使我能入睡。" 
康妮惊惧地向她的深思的标致的脸孔瞥了一眼。又是一个达娃斯哈出来的热情的人！和他的肉体的接触；"因为爱之束缚。不易解开！"
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