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但是她的前身却使她悲伤起来。这部分已经开始驰松了,现着一种差不多衰萎的松懈的消瘦,没有真正生活就已经老了。她想到她将来也许要有的孩子,她究竟配不配呢? She slipped into her nightdress, and went to bed, where she sobbed bitterly. And in her bitterness burned a cold indignation against Clifford, and his writings and his talk: against all the men of his sort who defrauded a woman even of her own body. 她穿上了睡衣,倒在床上苦痛地哭淬。在她的苦痛里,她对克利福,他的写作,和他的谈话,对所有期罔妇人和欺罔她们的肉体的男子们,燃烧着一种冷酷的愤懑! Unjust! Unjust! The sense of deep physical injustice burned to her very soul. But in the morning, all the same, she was up at seven, and going downstairs to Clifford. She had to help him in all the intimate things, for he had no man, and refused a woman-servant. The housekeeper's husband, who had known him as a boy, helped him, and did any heavy lifting; but Connie did the personal things, and she did them willingly. It was a demand on her, but she had wanted to do what she could. 这是不公平的,不平的!那肉体的深深不平的感觉,燃烧到了她灵魂的深处。但是,虽然如此,翌日早晨的七点钟。她还是照样起来,到楼下克利福那里去。她得帮助他梳洗更衣的一切私事,因为他已没有用男仆。而他又本愿意一个女仆人来帮助他。女管家的丈夫--他是当克利福还是孩童的时候便认识他的。帮助着他做些粗笨的事情。但是康妮却管理着一切私事,而且出于心愿。那是无可标何的,但是愿意尽她所能地傲去。 So she hardly ever went away from Wragby, and never for more than a day or two; when Mrs Betts, the housekeeper, attended to Clifford. He, as was inevitable in the course of time, took all the service for granted. It was natural he should. 所以她几乎从不离开勒格贝,就是离开也不过一二天,那时是女管家白蒂斯太太照料着克利福,他呢,日子久了自然而然地觉得康妮替他所做的事情是当然的,而他这种感觉毕竟也是自然的呵。 And yet, deep inside herself, a sense of injustice, of being defrauded, had begun to burn in Connie. The physical sense of injustice is a dangerous feeling, once it is awakened. It must have outlet, or it eats away the one in whom it is aroused. Poor Clifford, he was not to blame. His was the greater misfortune. It was all part of the general catastrophe. 虽然,在康妮的深心里,、却开始燃烧着一种不平的和彼人欺圈的感觉,肉体一旦感觉到了不平,这种感觉是危险的。这种感觉要发泄出来,否则它便要把怀着这感觉的人吞食的。可怜的克利福!那并不是他的过错。他比康妮更是不幸呢。这一切都是人间整个灾祸的一部分啊。 
然而,他真是没有一点儿可以责备的地方么?那热力的欠缺,那温暖的肉体的简单接触的欠缺,不是他地过错么?他从来不温热,甚至也不慈和,他只有一种冷淡、受过高等教养的人对人的恳切与尊重。但是他从来没有过一个男子对于妇人所有的那种温热。甚至如康妮的父亲对她所有的那种温热他都没有。那种男子的温热,虽只为着男子自己,而男子也只这样作想,无论怎样,一点男性的热烈是可以把一个妇人温暖起来的。 But Clifford was not like that. His whole race was not like that. They were all inwardly hard and separate, and warmth to them was just bad taste. You had to get on without it, and hold your own; which was all very well if you were of the same class and race. Then you could keep yourself cold and be very estimable, and hold your own, and enjoy the satisfaction of holding it. But if you were of another class and another race it wouldn't do; there was no fun merely holding your own, and feeling you belonged to the ruling class. What was the point, when even the smartest aristocrats had really nothing positive of their own to hold, and their rule was really a farce, not rule at all? What was the point? It was all cold nonsense. 但是克利福并不这样,他那一灯的人并不这样,他们的内心都是坚钝无情,他们以为热情是卑劣的东西。你得冷酷下去,守着你便可以守着的地位。但是,如果你不是那一阶级那和囊类的人,这便不行了死守着你的地位,觉着你自己是属于统治阶级的人,那不是好玩的事,那有什么意义?因为甚至最高贵的贵族,事实上已没有什么地佼可守,而他们的所谓统治,实际只是滑稽把戏,全不能说是统治了,那有什么意交?这一切只是无聊的胡闹罢了。 A sense of rebellion smouldered in Connie. What was the good of it all? What was the good of her sacrifice, her devoting her life to Clifford? What was she serving, after all? A cold spirit of vanity, that had no warm human contacts, and that was as corrupt as any low-born Jew, in craving for prostitution to the bitch-goddess, Success. Even Clifford's cool and contactless assurance that he belonged to the ruling class didn't prevent his tongue lolling out of his mouth, as he panted after the bitch-goddess. After all, Michaelis was really more dignified in the matter, and far, far more successful. Really, if you looked closely at Clifford, he was a buffoon, and a buffoon is more humiliating than a bounder. 康妮的反抗的感觉,潜然地滋生了。那一切究竟有什么用处?她的牺牲,以她的生命牺牲于克利福,究竟有什么用处?毕竟,她有什么于人有用的地方?那儿只有那种冷酷的虚荣心,没有温热的人道的接触,正如任何最下流的犹太人般的缺德,欲望着卖身与成功的财神。甚至克利福,那样的冷淡,那样的远引,那样的相信自已是属于统治的阶级,尚且不禁垂着舌头,喘着气息,追逐于财神之后,实在,在这种事中。蔑克里斯是尊严些的,他的成功是大得多的,真的,细看起来,克利福只是个丑角;而一个丑角是比一个光棍更卑下的。 As between the two men, Michaelis really had far more use for her than Clifford had. He had even more need of her. Any good nurse can attend to crippled legs! And as for the heroic effort, Michaelis was a heroic rat, and Clifford was very much of a poodle showing off. 在这两个男人中间,她对于蔑克里斯是较有用处的。而他比克利福也更需要她,因为任何一个好看护都能看护一个两腿风瘫的人!如果拿他们所做的英雄事业来说。蔑克里斯是个英雄的老鼠,而克利福只是个玩把戏的小狗。 There were people staying in the house, among them Clifford's Aunt Eva, Lady Bennerley. She was a thin woman of sixty, with a red nose, a widow, and still something of a grande dame. She belonged to one of the best families, and had the character to carry it off. Connie liked her, she was so perfectly simple and [rank, as far as she intended to be frank, and superficially kind. Inside herself she was a past-mistress in holding her own, and holding other people a little lower. She was not at all a snob: far too sure of herself. She was perfect at the social sport of coolly holding her own, and making other people defer to her. 家里现在来了些客人,其中一个是克利福的站母爱娃本纳利爵士夫人。这是一位六十岁的、有个红鼻子的瘦小的妇人,她是一个寡妇,依旧还有点贵妇的派判断,她出身名门,并且有名门的气性。康妮很喜欢她。当她愿意的时候,她是这样的简单率直,而且外表上是这样慈蔼。其实她对于守着她的地位,而且守到比他人高一点的它术上,她是个能手。她一点也不是个热利的人,她太相信自己了。在社交上,她是这样地善于冷静地守着自己的地位,而使他人向她让步。 
她对康妮很是亲切,用着她的出身高门的人的观察,象尖锐的钻予一样,努力地把也的妇人的灵魂的秘密刺穿。 You're quite wonderful, in my opinion,' she said to Connie. You've done wonders for Clifford. I never saw any budding genius myself, and there he is, all the rage.' Aunt Eva was quite complacently proud of Clifford's success. Another feather in the family cap! She didn't care a straw about his books, but why should she? " 我觉得你真可钦佩。"她对康妮说。"你替克利福真是出了惊人的力。他的天才的焕发,我是从不怀疑的。现在他是惊天动地了。"一……爱娃妨母对于克利福的成功,是十分得意的骄傲的。因为那是有光门据的!至于他的著作嘛,她倒是毫不关心的,关心干什么呢? Oh, I don't think it's my doing,' said Connie. " 啊,我不相信我出了。什么力。"康妮说。 It must be! Can't be anybody else's. And it seems to me you don't get enough out of it.' " 那一定是你的力。除了你以外,还有谁能出力呢?我觉得你得出报酬实在不够呢。" How?' " 怎么说的?" 
你扯你怎样的关闭在这里!我对克利福说过:要是这孩子那天反叛起来,你是活该哟。" But Clifford never denies me anything,' said Connie. " 但是克利福从来没有拒绝我什么的。"康妮说。 Look here, my dear child'---and Lady Bennerley laid her thin hand on Connie's arm. A woman has to live her life, or live to repent not having lived it. Believe me!' And she took another sip of brandy, which maybe was her form of repentance. " 你听我说吧,我亲爱的孩子,"本纳利夫人说着;把她的瘦小的手放在康妮的臂上,"一个女子得过她的生活,否则,,她使要后悔没有生活过,相信我吧!"她再啜了一日白兰地,那她也许就是后悔的形式吧。 But I do live my life, don't I?' " 但是,我不是正在过我的生活么?" Not in my idea! Clifford should bring you to London, and let you go about. His sort of friends are all right for him, but what are they for you? If I were you I should think it wasn't good enough. You'll let your youth slip by, and you'll spend your old age, and your middle age too, repenting it.' " 不,我不这样想。克利福应该把你带到伦敦去。让你走动走动。他所有的那一类的朋友们,对于他自己是很好的,但是对于你呢,假如我是你的话,我却不能满意。将空度了你的青春;你将在后悔中度你的老年生活。甚至中年生活。" 
这贵妇人给白兰地的力量镇静着,渐渐地陷在沉思的静默中了。 But Connie was not keen on going to London, and being steered into the smart world by Lady Bennerley. She didn't feel really smart, it wasn't interesting. And she did feel the peculiar, withering coldness under it all; like the soil of Labrador, which his gay little flowers on its surface, and a foot down is frozen. 便是康妮并不很想到伦敦而给本纳利夫人引导到那时髦的社会里去。她觉得她和那种社会是不合不来的。并且那种社会是不能使她发生兴趣的。她很觉得那种社会的下去,有一种怪异的令人畏缩的冷酷;象拉布拉多地土壤一般,地面上生长着一些愉快的小花朵,可是一尺以下却是冰冻的。 Tommy Dukes was at Wragby, and another man, Harry Winterslow, and Jack Strangeways with his wife Olive. The talk was much more desultory than when only the cronies were there, and everybody was a bit bored, for the weather was bad, and there was only billiards, and the pianola to dance to. 唐米·督克斯也在勒格贝,此外还有哈里·文达斯罗;贾。克·司登治魏和他的妻奥莉芜。他们间的谈话是不连贯的,不象知友们在一块时那们地一泻千里,大家都有点发闷,因为天气既不好,而消遣的东西又只不过打打牌子和开着留声机跳跳舞罢了。
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