目 录 上一节 下一节 
伊丽莎和乔治亚娜分明是按吩咐行事，尽量少同我搭讪。而约翰一见我就装鬼脸，有-回竟还想对我动武。像上次一样，我怒不可遏、忍无可忍，激起了一种犯罪的本性，顿时扑了上去。他一想还是住手的好，便逃离了我，一边破口大骂，诬赖我撕裂了他的鼻子。我的拳头确实瞄准了那个隆起的器官，出足力气狠狠一击。当我看到这一招或是我的目光使他吓破了胆时，我真想乘胜追击，达到目的，可是他已经逃到他妈妈那里了。我听他哭哭啼啼，开始讲述"那个讨厌的简.爱"如何像疯猫一样扑向他的故事。但他的哭诉立即被厉声喝住了。 "Don't talk to me about her, John: I told you not to go near her;she is not worthy of notice; I do not choose that either you or yoursisters should associate with her." 别跟我提起她了，约翰。我同你说过不要与她接近，她不值得理睬。我不愿意你或者你妹妹同她来往，" Here, leaning over the banister, I cried out suddenly, and withoutat all deliberating on my words - 这时，我扑出栏杆，突然不假思索地大叫了一声： "They are not fit to associate with me."" 他们还不配同我交往呢。" Mrs. Reed was rather a stout woman; but, on hearing this strange andaudacious declaration, she ran nimbly up the stair, swept me like awhirlwind into the nursery, and crushing me down on the edge of mycrib, dared me in an emphatic voice to rise from that place, orutter one syllable during the remainder of the day. 尽管里德太太的体态有些臃肿，但-听见我这不可思议的大胆宣告，便利索地登登登跑上楼梯，一阵风似地把我拖进保育室，按倒在小床的床沿上，气势汹汹地说，谅我那天再也不敢从那里爬起来，或是再吭一声了。 
要是里德先生还活着，他会同你说什么？"我几乎无意中问了这个问题。我说几乎无意，是因为我的舌头仿佛不由自主地吐出了这句话，完全是随意倾泻，不受控制。 "What?" said Mrs. Reed under her breath: her usually cold composedgrey eye became troubled with a look like fear; she took her handfrom my arm, and gazed at me as if she really did not know whether Iwere child or fiend. I was now in for it." 什么，"里德太太咕哝着说。她平日冷漠平静的灰色眸子显得惶惶不安，露出了近乎恐惧的神色。她从我的胳膊中抽回手，死死盯着我，仿佛真的弄不明白我究竟是个孩童还是魔鬼。这时，我骑虎难下了。 "My Uncle Reed is in heaven, and can see all you do and think; andso can papa and mama: they know how you shut me up all day long,and how you wish me dead."" 里德舅舅在天堂里，你做的和想的，他都看得清清楚楚。我爸爸妈妈也看得清清楚楚。他们知道你把我关了一整天，还巴不得我死掉。" Mrs. Reed soon rallied her spirits: she shook me most soundly, sheboxed both my ears, and then left me without a word. Bessiesupplied the hiatus by a homily of an hour's length, in which sheproved beyond a doubt that I was the most wicked and abandoned childever reared under a roof. I half believed her; for I felt indeedonly bad feelings surging in my breast. 里德太太很快便定下神来，狠命推搡我，扇我耳光，随后二话没说扔下我就走。在留下的空隙里，贝茜喋喋不休进行了长达一个小时的说教，证实我无疑是家里养大的最坏、最放任的孩子，弄得我也有些半信半疑。因为我确实觉得，在我胸膛里翻腾的只有恶感。 November, December, and half of January passed away. Christmas andthe New Year had been celebrated at Gateshead with the usual festivecheer; presents had been interchanged, dinners and evening partiesgiven. From every enjoyment I was, of course, excluded: my shareof the gaiety consisted in witnessing the daily apparelling of Elizaand Georgiana, and seeing them descend to the drawing-room, dressedout in thin muslin frocks and scarlet sashes, with hair elaboratelyringletted; and afterwards, in listening to the sound of the pianoor the harp played below, to the passing to and fro of the butlerand footman, to the jingling of glass and china as refreshments werehanded, to the broken hum of conversation as the drawing-room dooropened and closed. When tired of this occupation, I would retirefrom the stairhead to the solitary and silent nursery: there,though somewhat sad, I was not miserable. To speak truth, I had notthe least wish to go into company, for in company I was very rarelynoticed; and if Bessie had but been kind and companionable, I shouldhave deemed it a treat to spend the evenings quietly with her,instead of passing them under the formidable eye of Mrs. Reed, in aroom full of ladies and gentlemen. But Bessie, as soon as she haddressed her young ladies, used to take herself off to the livelyregions of the kitchen and housekeeper's room, generally bearing thecandle along with her. I then sat with my doll on my knee till thefire got low, glancing round occasionally to make sure that nothingworse than myself haunted the shadowy room; and when the embers sankto a dull red, I undressed hastily, tugging at knots and strings asI best might, and sought shelter from cold and darkness in my crib.To this crib I always took my doll; human beings must lovesomething, and, in the dearth of worthier objects of affection, Icontrived to find a pleasure in loving and cherishing a faded gravenimage, shabby as a miniature scarecrow. It puzzles me now toremember with what absurd sincerity I doated on this little toy,half fancying it alive and capable of sensation. I could not sleepunless it was folded in my night-gown; and when it lay there safeand warm, I was comparatively happy, believing it to be happylikewise. 十一月、十二月和一月的上半月转眼已逝去。在盖茨黑德，圣诞节和元旦照例喜气洋洋地庆祝一番，相互交换礼物，举行圣诞晚餐和晚会，当然，这些享受一概与我无缘，我的那份乐趣是每天眼睁睁瞧着伊丽莎和乔治亚娜的装束，看她们着薄纱上衣，系大红腰带，披着精心制作的卷发下楼到客厅去。随后倾听楼下弹奏钢琴和竖琴的声音，管家和仆人来来往往的脚步声，上点心时杯盘磕碰的叮咚声，随着客厅门启闭时断时续传来的谈话声，听腻了。我会离开楼梯口，走进孤寂的保育室。那里尽管也有些许 悲哀，但心里并不难受，说实话，我绝对无意去凑热闹，因为就是去了，也很少有人理我，要是贝茜肯好好陪我，我觉得与她相守，安静地度过多夜晚倒也一种享受，强似在满屋少爷小姐、太太先生中间、里德太太令人生畏的目光下，挨过那些时刻，但是，贝茜往往把小姐们一打扮停当，便抽身上厨房、女管家室等热闹场所去了，还总把蜡烛也带走。随后，我把玩偶放在膝头枯坐着，直至炉火渐渐暗淡，还不时东张西望，弄清楚除了我没有更可怕的东西光顾这昏暗的房间，待到余烬褪为暗红色，我便急急忙忙、拿出吃奶的劲来，宽衣解带，钻进小床，躲避寒冷与黑暗，我常把玩偶随身带到床上，人总得爱点什么，在缺乏更值得爱的东西的时候，我便设想以珍爱一个褪了色的布偶来获得愉快，尽管这个玩偶已经破烂不堪，活像个小小的稻草人，此刻忆起这件往事，也令我迷惑不解，当时，我是带着何等荒谬的虔诚来溺爱这小玩具的呀！我还有点相信它有血有肉有感觉，只有把它裹进了睡袍我才能入睡，一旦它暖融融安然无恙地躺在那里，我便觉得愉快多了，而且这玩偶也有同感。 
我似乎要等很久很久客人们才散去，才候着贝茜上楼的脚步声，有时她会在中间上楼来，找顶针或剪刀，或者端上一个小面包、奶酪饼什么的当作我的晚餐。她会坐在床上看我吃。我一吃完，她会替我把被子塞好，亲了我两下，说："晚安，简小姐。"贝茜和颜悦色的时候，我就觉得她是人世间最好、最漂亮、最善良的人，我热切希望她会总是那么讨人喜欢，那么和蔼可亲，不要老是支使我，骂我，无理责备我，我现在想来，贝茜.李一定是位很有天赋的姑娘，因为她干什么都在行，还有善讲故事的惊人诀窍，至少保育室故事留给我的印象，让我可以作出这样的判断。如果我对她的脸蛋和身材没有记错，那她还长得很漂亮。在我的记忆中，她是个身材苗条的少妇，有着墨色的头发，乌黑的眸子，端正的五官和光洁的皮肤，但她任性急躁，缺乏原则性和正义感。尽管加此，在盖茨黑德府的人中、我最喜欢她。 It was the fifteenth of January, about nine o'clock in the morning:Bessie was gone down to breakfast; my cousins had not yet beensummoned to their mama; Eliza was putting on her bonnet and warmgarden-coat to go and feed her poultry, an occupation of which shewas fond: and not less so of selling the eggs to the housekeeperand hoarding up the money she thus obtained. She had a turn fortraffic, and a marked propensity for saving; shown not only in thevending of eggs and chickens, but also in driving hard bargains withthe gardener about flower-roots, seeds, and slips of plants; thatfunctionary having orders from Mrs. Reed to buy of his young ladyall the products of her parterre she wished to sell: and Elizawould have sold the hair off her head if she could have made ahandsome profit thereby. As to her money, she first secreted it inodd corners, wrapped in a rag or an old curl-paper; but some ofthese hoards having been discovered by the housemaid, Eliza, fearfulof one day losing her valued treasure, consented to intrust it toher mother, at a usurious rate of interest--fifty or sixty percent.; which interest she exacted every quarter, keeping heraccounts in a little book with anxious accuracy. 那是一月十五日早上九点。贝茜已下楼去用早餐，我的表兄妹们还没有被叫唤到他们妈妈身边。伊丽莎正戴上宽边帽，穿上暖和的园艺服，出喂她的家禽。这活儿她百做不厌，并不逊于把鸡鱼类给女管家，把所得钱藏匿起来，她有做买卖的才干，有突出的聚财癖，不仅表现在兜售鸡蛋和鸡方面，而且也在跟园艺工就花茎、花籽和插枝而拼命讨价还价上显露出来，里德太太曾吩咐园艺工，凡是伊丽莎想卖掉的花圃产品，他都得统统买下。而要是能赚大钱，伊丽莎连出售自己的头发也心甘情愿。至于所得的钱，起初她用破布或陈旧的卷发纸包好，藏在偏僻的角落里。但后来其中一些秘藏物被女佣所发现，她深怕有一天丢失她值钱的宝藏，同意由她母亲托管，收取近乎高利贷的利息--百分之五十或六十，一个季度索讨一次。她还把帐记在一个小本子上，算得分毫不差。 Georgiana sat on a high stool, dressing her hair at the glass, andinterweaving her curls with artificial flowers and faded feathers,of which she had found a store in a drawer in the attic. I wasmaking my bed, having received strict orders from Bessie to get itarranged before she returned (for Bessie now frequently employed meas a sort of under-nurserymaid, to tidy the room, dust the chairs,&c.). Having spread the quilt and folded my night-dress, I went tothe window-seat to put in order some picture-books and doll's housefurniture scattered there; an abrupt command from Georgiana to lether playthings alone (for the tiny chairs and mirrors, the fairyplates and cups, were her property) stopped my proceedings; andthen, for lack of other occupation, I fell to breathing on thefrost-flowers with which the window was fretted, and thus clearing aspace in the glass through which I might look out on the grounds,where all was still and petrified under the influence of a hardfrost. 乔治亚娜坐在一条高脚凳上，对镜梳理着自己的头发。她把一朵朵人造花和一根根褪色的羽毛插到卷发上，这些东西是她在阁楼上的一个抽屉里找到的。我正在铺床，因为根据贝茜的严格指令，我得在她回来之前把一切都收拾停当（贝茜现在常常把我当作保育室女佣下手来使唤，吩咐我整理房间、擦掉椅子上的灰尘等等），我摊开被子，叠好睡衣后，便走向窗台，正把散乱的图画书和玩偶家具放好，却突然传来了乔治亚娜指手划脚的吆喝不许我动她的玩具（因为这些椅子、镜子、小盘子和小杯子都是她的财产），于是只好歇手。一时无所事事，便开始往凝结在窗上的霜花哈气，在玻璃上化开了一小块地方，透过它可以眺望外面 的院落，那里的一切在严霜的威力之下，仿佛凝固了似的寂然不动。
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