名著·查太莱夫人的情人 - 第90节

　　你对付你所有的病人也这样么？"康妮问道。

'Oh, That's different. I don't care at all, in the same way. I know what's good for them, or I try to, and then I just contrive to manage them for their own good. It's not like anybody as you're really fond of. It's quite different. Once you've been really fond of a man, you can be affectionate to almost any man, if he needs you at all. But it's not the same thing. You don't really care. I doubt, once you've really cared, if you can ever really care again.' "

　　啊，那是不同的。我对他们不是这样的。我知道什么是对于他们有益的，或者我努力去知道，然后我设法为他们的好处帮去。那和自己真正所爱的人是不相同的，大不相同的，假如你真正地爱过丁一个人，你使差不多能对任何人表示亲爱，甚至他不太需要你，但那是不同的，你不是真正爱他的，一个人真正地爱过了一回，如果还能真正地再爱一回，那是可疑的。"

These words frightened Connie.

　　这话把康妮吓着丁。

'Do you think one can only care once?' she asked. "

　　你以为一个人只能爱一次么？"她问道。

'Or never. Most women never care, never begin to. They don't know what it means. Nor men either. But when I see a woman as cares, my heart stands still for her.' "

　　爱一次，或永远不爱，大多数的女子是从来不爱，从来不开始爱的，她们不知爱是什么东西。男子也不例外。我呢，当我看见了一个女子在恋爱的时候，我对他是满腔同情的。"

　　你觉得男子是易动怒的么？"

'Yes! If you wound them on their pride. But aren't women the same? Only our two prides are a bit different.' "

　　是的，假如你伤了他们的虚荣心。但是女子还不是一样？不过男子的虚荣心和女子的有点不同罢了。"

Connie pondered this. She began again to have some misgiving about her gag away. After all, was she not giving her man the go-by, if only for a short time? And he knew it. That's why he was so queer and sarcastic.

　　康妮把这些话思量着，她对于她到威尼斯去的事，又开始有点疑惧起来，实在说来，她不是故意要躲避她的爱人么？一虽然是短时间，他是知道的，所以他的神气是那么怪异和讥。

Still! the human existence is a good deal controlled by the machine of external circumstance. She was in the power of this machine. She couldn't extricate herself all in five minutes. She didn't even want to.

　　虽然！人生常是受环境的机械所支配的，康妮便是这机械的栖牲者。她不能在五分钟内摆脱出来，她甚至边摆脱的心也没有了。

Hilda arrived in good time on Thursday morning, in a nimble two-seater car, with her suit-case strapped firmly behind. She looked as demure and maidenly as ever, but she had the same will of her own. She had the very hell of a will of her own, as her husband had found out. But the husband was now divorcing her. Yes, she even made it easy for him to do that, though she had no lover. For the time being, she was 'off' men. She was very well content to be quite her own mistress: and mistress of her two children, whom she was going to bring up 'properly', whatever that may mean.

　　星期四的早晨，希尔达按照预定的时间来到，驶着她的两座轻便汽车，她的衣箱用皮带牢牢地缚在后边，和平家一样，她的样子是端庄的，处女的；但是也和平至少一样，她有着一种倔强的气概，她有一种魔鬼似的倔强的自我意志，这是她的丈夫发觉的。但是现在，这位丈夫正在要求和始离婚了。她呢，她虽然没有情人，但她却给了他许多方便，好去提他的要求。目下。她和男子们疏远了。她倒觉得很满意自己做了自己的主人，和她的两个孩子的主人，她打算把这两个孩子"好好地"教养成人，不管这个词的意义怎样解释。

　　在小汽车上，康妮也只准带一口衣箱。但是她已经把一日大箱子寄绘她的父亲，由火车带去了。她的父亲刚由苏格兰到伦。他认为到威尼斯何必坐汽车去？在七月天，在意大利用汽车旅行是太热了，所以他还是舒舒服服地乘火车去。

So, like a demure arcadian field-marshal, Hilda arranged the material part of the journey. She and Connie sat in the upstairs room, chatting.

　　这样，希尔达俨然大元帅似的，严肃地把旅丢失重要事件计划好了。她和康妮在楼上的房子里闸谈着。

'But Hilda!' said Connie, a little frightened. 'I want to stay near here tonight. Not here: near here!' "

　　但是，希尔达，"康妮说，心里有点惊惧着她要说下去的话．"今晚我要在这我和附近过夜；不是这儿；是这儿附近。"

Hilda fixed her sister with grey, inscrutable eyes. She seemed so calm: and she was so often furious.

　　希尔达的灰色的、不可思议的跟随，注视着她的妹妹。她的样子似乎非常镇静，但是她却常常盛怒起来。

'Where, near here?' she asked softly. "

　　传播对方，这儿购近？"她柔和地问道。

　　希尔达，你知道我爱上了一个人吧，是不是？"

'I gathered there was something.' "

　　是的，我是知道有了什么事情的。"

'Well he lives near here, and I want to spend this last night with him must! I've promised.' "

　　那么，他住在这儿附近。我要和他共度过最后的一夜，我得去！我已经答应了。"

Connie became insistent.

　　康妮固执起来了。

Hilda bent her Minerva-like head in silence. Then she looked up.

　　希尔达静默地低着她的象密涅瓦一样的头，然后望着她。

　　你愿意告诉我他是谁么？她说。

'He's our game-keeper,' faltered Connie, and she flushed vividly, like a shamed child. "

　　他是我们的守猎人，"康妮支吾着说，她的脸孔鲜红起来，好象有个做了坏事的孩子一样。

'Connie!' said Hilda, lifting her nose slightly with disgust: a she had from her mother. "

　　康妮！"希尔达说，厌恶地道挺着她的鼻子一这是她母亲传下的姿势。

'I know: but he's lovely really. He really understands tenderness,' said Connie, trying to apologize for him. "

　　我明白，但是他的确是可爱的人，他的的确是了解温情的人。"康妮企图为她的爱人辩护。

Hilda, like a ruddy, rich-coloured Athena, bowed her head and pondered She was really violently angry. But she dared not show it, because Connie, taking after her father, would straight away become obstreperous and unmanageable.

　　希尔达，象脸色鲜艳的雅典娜似的低头沉思着。产际上她正在暴怒着．但是她不敢露了出来，因为酷肖父亲的康妮，努势将立刻放肆争抗起来。