目 录 上一节 下一节 
一个狂野的神色使他双眉直竖--那神色掠过他的脸庞。他站了起来，但又忍下了。我把手靠在椅背上撑住自己，我颤抖，我害怕一-但我很镇定。 "One instant, Jane. Give one glance to my horrible life when youare gone. All happiness will be torn away with you. What then isleft? For a wife I have but the maniac upstairs: as well might yourefer me to some corpse in yonder churchyard. What shall I do,Jane? Where turn for a companion and for some hope?"" 等一下，简。你走之前，再看一眼我那可怕的生活。你一走，一切幸福也就被夺走了。然后留下了什么呢？作为妻子，我只有一个疯子在楼上，你还不如把我同墓地里的死尸扯在一起。我该怎么办，简？哪儿去找伙伴，哪儿还能寻觅希望？" "Do as I do: trust in God and yourself. Believe in heaven. Hopeto meet again there."" 像我一样办吧，相信上帝和你自己，相信上天，希望在那儿再次见到你。" "Then you will not yield?"" 那你不改变主意了？" "No."" 不。" 
那你判我活着受罪，死了挨骂吗？"他提高了嗓门。 "I advise you to live sinless, and I wish you to die tranquil."" 我劝你活得清白，希望你死得安宁。" "Then you snatch love and innocence from me? You fling me back onlust for a passion--vice for an occupation?"" 那你就把爱情和纯洁从我这里夺走了？你把我推回老路，拿肉欲当爱情--以作恶为职业？" "Mr. Rochester, I no more assign this fate to you than I grasp at itfor myself. We were born to strive and endure--you as well as I:do so. You will forget me before I forget you."" 罗切斯特先生，我没有把这种命运强加给你，就像我自己不会把它当作我的命运一样。我们生来就是苦难和忍受的，你我都一样，就这么去做吧。我还没有忘掉，你就会先忘掉我。" "You make me a liar by such language: you sully my honour. Ideclared I could not change: you tell me to my face I shall changesoon. And what a distortion in your judgment, what a perversity inyour ideas, is proved by your conduct! Is it better to drive afellow-creature to despair than to transgress a mere human law, noman being injured by the breach? for you have neither relatives noracquaintances whom you need fear to offend by living with me?"" 你说这样的话是要把我当成一个骗子：你败坏了我的名誉。我宣布我不会变心，而你却当着我的面说我很快就会变心。你的行为证明，你的判断存在着多大的歪曲：你的观念又是何等的反常！难道仅仅违背人类的一个法律不是比把你的同类推向绝望更好吗？一一任何人都不会因为违背法律而受到伤害，因为你既无亲戚又无熟人，不必害怕由于同我生活而得罪他们。" 
这倒是真的。他说话时我的良心和理智都背叛了我，指控我犯了同他对抗的罪。两者似乎像感情一样大叫大嚷。感情疯狂地叫喊着。"呵，同意吧！"它说。"想想他的痛苦，考虑考虑他的危险--看看他一个人被丢下时的样子吧，记住他轻率冒险的本性，想一想伴随绝望而来的鲁莽吧，--安慰他，拯救他，爱他。告诉他你爱他，而且是属于他的。世上有谁来关心你？你的所作所为会伤着谁呢？" Still indomitable was the reply--"I care for myself. The moresolitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more Iwill respect myself. I will keep the law given by God; sanctionedby man. I will hold to the principles received by me when I wassane, and not mad--as I am now. Laws and principles are not for thetimes when there is no temptation: they are for such moments asthis, when body and soul rise in mutiny against their rigour;stringent are they; inviolate they shall be. If at my individualconvenience I might break them, what would be their worth? Theyhave a worth--so I have always believed; and if I cannot believe itnow, it is because I am insane--quite insane: with my veins runningfire, and my heart beating faster than I can count its throbs.Preconceived opinions, foregone determinations, are all I have atthis hour to stand by: there I plant my foot." 但是那回答依然是不可改变的一一"我关心我自己，愈是孤单，愈是没有朋友，愈是无助，那我就愈是自尊。我会遵守上帝创造、由人批准的法规，我会坚持我清醒时，而不是像现在这样发疯时服从的准则。法规和准则不光是为了没有诱惑的时刻，而是针对现在这样，肉体和灵魂起来抗拒它的严厉和苛刻的时候。它们再严厉也是不可破坏的。要是出于我个人的方便而加以违背，那它们还有什么价值？它们是有价值的-一我向来是这么相信的。如果我此刻不信，那是因为我疯了--疯得可厉害啦，我的血管里燃烧着火，我的心跳快得难以计数。此刻我所能依靠的是原有的想法和以往的决心：我要巍然不动地站在那里。" I did. Mr. Rochester, reading my countenance, saw I had done so.His fury was wrought to the highest: he must yield to it for amoment, whatever followed; he crossed the floor and seized my armand grasped my waist. He seemed to devour me with his flamingglance: physically, I felt, at the moment, powerless as stubbleexposed to the draught and glow of a furnace: mentally, I stillpossessed my soul, and with it the certainty of ultimate safety.The soul, fortunately, has an interpreter--often an unconscious, butstill a truthful interpreter--in the eye. My eye rose to his; andwhile I looked in his fierce face I gave an involuntary sigh; hisgripe was painful, and my over-taxed strength almost exhausted. 我这么做了，罗切斯特先生观察着我的脸色，看出我已经这么办了。他的怒气被激到了极点。不管会产生什么后果，他都得发作一会儿。他从房间一头走过来，抓住我胳膊，把我的腰紧紧抱住。他眼睛那么冒火，仿佛要把我吞下去似的。肉体上，这时我无能为力，就像扔在炉中强风和火光里的草根--精神上，我的心灵保持着克制，正因为这样，我对最终的安全很有把握。幸亏灵魂有一个诠释者--常常是位无意识的，却仍是忠实的诠释者--那就是眼睛。我与他目光相对，一面瞪着他那付凶相，一面不由自主地叹了口气。他那么紧握着使我很痛，我由于过分用力而精疲力尽了。 "Never," said he, as he ground his teeth, "never was anything atonce so frail and so indomitable. A mere reed she feels in myhand!" (And he shook me with the force of his hold.) "I could bendher with my finger and thumb: and what good would it do if I bent,if I uptore, if I crushed her? Consider that eye: consider theresolute, wild, free thing looking out of it, defying me, with morethan courage--with a stern triumph. Whatever I do with its cage, Icannot get at it--the savage, beautiful creature! If I tear, if Irend the slight prison, my outrage will only let the captive loose.Conqueror I might be of the house; but the inmate would escape toheaven before I could call myself possessor of its clay dwelling-place. And it is you, spirit--with will and energy, and virtue andpurity--that I want: not alone your brittle frame. Of yourself youcould come with soft flight and nestle against my heart, if youwould: seized against your will, you will elude the grasp like anessence--you will vanish ere I inhale your fragrance. Oh! come,Jane, come!"" 从来没有，"他咬牙切齿地说，"从来没有任何东西既那么脆弱，又那么顽强。在我手里她摸上去只不过像根芦苇，（他紧握着手使劲摇我），我可以不费吹灰之力把它弄弯曲，但要是我把它弄弯了，拔起来，碾碎它，那又有什么用？想想那双眼睛，想想从中射出的坚定、狂野、自在的目光，蔑视我，内中隐含的不止是勇气，而是严峻的胜利感。不管我怎么摆弄这笼子，我无法靠拢它--这野蛮、漂亮的家伙，要是我撕坏或者打破这小小的监狱，我的暴行只会让囚徒获得自由。我也许可以成为这所房子的征服者，但我还来不及称自己为泥屋的拥有人，里边的居住者会早就飞到天上去了。而我要的正是你的精神--富有意志、活力、德行和纯洁，而不单是你脆弱的躯体。如果你愿意，你自己可以轻轻地飞来，偎依着我的心坎，而要是违背你的意思死死抓住你，你会像一阵香气那样在我手掌中溜走一-我还没有闻到你就消失了。呵！来吧，简，来吧！" As he said this, he released me from his clutch, and only looked atme. The look was far worse to resist than the frantic strain: onlyan idiot, however, would have succumbed now. I had dared andbaffled his fury; I must elude his sorrow: I retired to the door. 他一面说，一面松开了紧握的手，只是看着我。这眼神远比发疯似的紧扯难以抗拒。然而现在只有傻瓜才会屈服。我已面对他的怒火，把它挫败了。我得避开他的忧愁，便向门边走去。 
你走了，简？" "I am going, sir."" 我走了，先生。" "You are leaving me?"" 你离开我了？" "Yes."" 是的。" "You will not come? You will not be my comforter, my rescuer? Mydeep love, my wild woe, my frantic prayer, are all nothing to you?"" 你不来了？你不愿来抚慰我，拯救我？--我深沉的爱，凄楚的悲苦，疯狂的祈求，你都无动于衷？" 
他的嗓音里带着一种多么难以言表的悲哀！要毅然决然重复"我走了"这句话有多难！ "Jane!"" 简！" "Mr. Rochester!"" 罗切斯特先生。" "Withdraw, then,--I consent; but remember, you leave me here inanguish. Go up to your own room; think over all I have said, and,Jane, cast a glance on my sufferings--think of me."" 那么你就离开吧一-我同意--但记住，你撇下我在这儿痛苦不堪。上你自己的房间去，细细想想我说过的话，而且，简，看上一眼我的痛苦吧一-想想我吧。" He turned away; he threw himself on his face on the sofa. "Oh,Jane! my hope--my love--my life!" broke in anguish from his lips.Then came a deep, strong sob. 他走开了，一脸扎进了沙发。"呵，简！我的希望--我的爱-一我的生命！"他痛苦地脱口而出，随后响起了深沉而强烈的哭泣声。
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