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要是一阵风和几滴雨就弄得我放弃这些轻而易举的工作，那么这样懒懒散散，又怎么能为我设想的未来作准备呢？" Diana and Mary's general answer to this question was a sigh, andsome minutes of apparently mournful meditation. 黛安娜和玛丽对这个问题的回答，往往是一声叹息和几分钟明显伤心的沉默。 But besides his frequent absences, there was another barrier tofriendship with him: he seemed of a reserved, an abstracted, andeven of a brooding nature. Zealous in his ministerial labours,blameless in his life and habits, he yet did not appear to enjoythat mental serenity, that inward content, which should bet hereward of every sincere Christian and practical philanthropist.Often, of an evening, when he sat at the window, his desk and papersbefore him, he would cease reading or writing, rest his chin on hishand, and deliver himself up to I know not what course of thought;but that it was perturbed and exciting might be seen in the frequentflash and changeful dilation of his eye. 但是除了因为他频繁外出之外，还有另一大障碍使我无法与他建立友情。他似乎是个生性寡言少语、心不在焉、沉思默想的人，尽管他对牧师工作非常热情，生活习惯上也无可指摘，但他好像并没有享受到每个虔诚的基督徒和脚踏实地的慈善家应得的酬报：内心的宁静和满足。晚上，他常常坐在窗前，对着面前的书桌和纸张会停止阅读和写作，把下巴靠在手上，任自己的思绪不知向什么方向飘忽，但显得局促不安，从他眼睛频繁的闪烁和变幻莫测的张合中，可以看到兴奋与激动。 I think, moreover, that Nature was not to him that treasury ofdelight it was to his sisters. He expressed once, and but once inmy hearing, a strong sense of the rugged charm of the hills, and aninborn affection for the dark roof and hoary walls he called hishome; but there was more of gloom than pleasure in the tone andwords in which the sentiment was manifested; and never did he seemto roam the moors for the sake of their soothing silence--never seekout or dwell upon the thousand peaceful delights they could yield. 此外，我认为大自然对于他并不像对于她妹妹那样是快乐的源泉。我听到过一次，也只有-次，他表示自己被崎岖的小山深深地迷住了，同时对被他称之为自己家的黑色屋顶和灰白的墙壁，怀着一种眷恋之情。但是在表达这种情感的音调和语言中，隐含的忧郁甚于愉快。而且他从来没有因为要感受一下荒原舒心的字静而漫步其中，-一从来没有去发现或谈及荒原给人千百种平静的乐趣。 Incommunicative as he was, some time elapsed before I had anopportunity of gauging his mind. I first got an idea of its calibrewhen I heard him preach in his own church at Morton. I wish I coulddescribe that sermon: but it is past my power. I cannot evenrender faithfully the effect it produced on me. 由于他不爱交际，我过了一些时候才有机会探究他的思想。我听了他在莫尔顿自己的教堂讲道后，对他的能力有了初步的了解。我希望能描绘一下他那次讲道，但无能为力，我甚至无法确切表达它给我的印象。 
开头很平静一-其实，以讲演的风格和语调而言，那是自始至终很平静的。一种发自肺腑而严加控制的热情，很快注进了清晰的语调，激发起了生动的语言，话渐渐地变得有力起来--简练、浓缩而有分寸。牧师的力量使人内心为之震颤，头脑为之惊异，但两者都没有被感化。他的讲演自始至终有着一种奇怪的痛苦，缺乏一种抚慰人的温柔。他不断严厉地提到加尔文主义--上帝的选拔、命定和天罚，每次的提醒听起来仿佛是在宣布末日的来临。布道结束以后，我不是受到他讲演的启发，感觉更好更平静了，而是体会到了一种难以言喻的哀伤。因为我似乎觉得--我不知道别人是不是有同样感觉--我所倾听的雄辩，出自于充满混浊的失望之渣的心灵深处-一那里躁动着无法满足的愿望和不安的憧憬。我确信圣.约翰.里弗斯尽管生活单纯，又真诚热情，却并没有找到不可理解的上帝的安宁。我想他与我一样，都没有找到。我是因为打碎了偶像，失去了天堂而产生了隐蔽而焦躁不安的悔恨一-这些悔恨我虽然最近已避而不谈，但仍无情地纠缠着、威压着我。 Meantime a month was gone. Diana and Mary were soon to leave MoorHouse, and return to the far different life and scene which awaitedthem, as governesses in a large, fashionable, south-of-England city,where each held a situation in families by whose wealthy and haughtymembers they were regarded only as humble dependants, and whoneither knew nor sought out their innate excellences, andappreciated only their acquired accomplishments as they appreciatedthe skill of their cook or the taste of their waiting-woman. Mr.St. John had said nothing to me yet about the employment he hadpromised to obtain for me; yet it became urgent that I should have avocation of some kind. One morning, being left alone with him a fewminutes in the parlour, I ventured to approach the window-recess--which his table, chair, and desk consecrated as a kind of study--andI was going to speak, though not very well knowing in what words toframe my inquiry--for it is at all times difficult to break the iceof reserve glassing over such natures as his--when he saved me thetrouble by being the first to commence a dialogue. 与此同时，一个月过去了。黛安娜和玛丽不久就离开沼泽居，回到等待着的截然不同的生活环境中去，在英国南部一个时髦的城市当家庭教师。她们各自在别人家里谋职，被富有而高傲的家庭成员们视为低下的附庸。这些人既不了解也不去发现她们内在的美德，而只赏识她们已经获得的技艺，如同赏识他们厨师的手艺和侍女的情趣。圣.约翰先生一句也没有说起答应帮我找的工作，而对我来说谋个职业已是迫在眉睫的事了。一天早晨，我与他单独在客厅里呆了几分钟，我冒昧地走近窗子的凹陷处--他的桌子、椅子和书桌已使这里成了个书房--我正要开口，尽管还不十分明白该用怎样的措词把问题提出来--因为无论何时要打破包裹着他这种性格的拘谨外壳，都是十分困难的一-他省了我麻烦，先开口了。 Looking up as I drew near--"You have a question to ask of me?" hesaid. 我走近时他抬起头来，"你有问题要问我吗，"他说。 "Yes; I wish to know whether you have heard of any service I canoffer myself to undertake?"" 是的，我想知道一下你是否听到过什么我能够做的工作。" "I found or devised something for you three weeks ago; but as youseemed both useful and happy here--as my sisters had evidentlybecome attached to you, and your society gave them unusual pleasure--I deemed it inexpedient to break in on your mutual comfort tilltheir approaching departure from Marsh End should render yoursnecessary."" 三个星期前我找到了或是替你设计了某个工作，但你在这里似乎既很有用处，自己又很愉快--我的妹妹们显然同你形影不离，有你作伴她们格外开心一-我觉得妨碍你们彼此所感到的快慰是不适宜的，还是等她们快要离开沼泽居因而你也有必要离开时再说。" 
现在她们三天后就要走了："我说。 "Yes; and when they go, I shall return to the parsonage at Morton:Hannah will accompany me; and this old house will be shut up."" 是呀，她们一走我就要回到莫尔顿的牧师住所去，汉娜随我走，这所老房子要关闭。" I waited a few moments, expecting he would go on with the subjectfirst broached: but he seemed to have entered another train ofreflection: his look denoted abstraction from me and my business.I was obliged to recall him to a theme which was of necessity one ofclose and anxious interest to me. 我等了一会儿，以为他会继续他首次提出的话题，但他似乎已另有所思。他明显走了神，忘了我和我的事儿。我不得不把他拉回出于需要已成为我最迫切最关心的话题。 "What is the employment you had in view, Mr. Rivers? I hope thisdelay will not have increased the difficulty of securing it."" 你想到了什么工作，里弗斯先生？我希望这次拖延不至于增加谋职的难度。" "Oh, no; since it is in employment which depends only on me to give,and you to accept."" 呵，不会。既然这项工作只决定于我来提供，你来接受。" 
他又不吱声了，仿佛不愿再继续说下去。我有些耐不住了，--两个不安的动作以及一个急切而严厉的眼神落在他脸上，向他表达了同语言一样有效，但省却了不少麻烦的情感。 "You need be in no hurry to hear," he said: "let me frankly tellyou, I have nothing eligible or profitable to suggest. Before Iexplain, recall, if you please, my notice, clearly given, that if Ihelped you, it must be as the blind man would help the lame. I ampoor; for I find that, when I have paid my father's debts, all thepatrimony remaining to me will be this crumbling grange, the row ofscathed firs behind, and the patch of moorish soil, with the yew-trees and holly-bushes in front. I am obscure: Rivers is an oldname; but of the three sole descendants of the race, two earn thedependant's crust among strangers, and the third considers himselfan alien from his native country--not only for life, but in death.Yes, and deems, and is bound to deem, himself honoured by the lot,and aspires but after the day when the cross of separation fromfleshly ties shall be laid on his shoulders, and when the Head ofthat church-militant of whose humblest members he is one, shall givethe word, 'Rise, follow Me!'"" 你不必急于听到，"他说，"坦率告诉你吧，我没有什么合适的或是挣钱的工作可以建议。我解释之前，请回忆一下，我明明白白地向你打过招呼，要是我帮你，那得是瞎子帮助跛子。我很穷，因为我发现偿付了父亲的债务后，父亲留给我的全部遗产就只有这个摇摇欲坠的田庄，庄后一排枯萎的杉树，一片前面长着紫杉和冬青灌木的荒土。我出身卑微，里弗斯是个古老的名字。但这个族的三个仅存的后裔，两个在陌生人中间依赖他人为生，第三个认为自己是远离故土的异乡人--活着和死了都是如此。是的，他认为，必然认为这样的命运是他的光荣，他盼望有朝一日摆脱尘世束缚的十字架会放在他肩上，那位自己也是最卑微一员的教会斗士的首领会传下号令：起来，跟着我？" St. John said these words as he pronounced his sermons, with aquiet, deep voice; with an unflushed cheek, and a coruscatingradiance of glance. He resumed - 圣.约翰像布道一样说着这些话，语调平静而深沉，脸不发红，目光炯炯。他继续说： "And since I am myself poor and obscure, I can offer you but aservice of poverty and obscurity. YOU may even think it degrading--for I see now your habits have been what the world calls refined:your tastes lean to the ideal, and your society has at least beenamongst the educated; but I consider that no service degrades whichcan better our race. I hold that the more arid and unreclaimed thesoil where the Christian labourer's task of tillage is appointedhim--the scantier the meed his toil brings--the higher the honour.His, under such circumstances, is the destiny of the pioneer; andthe first pioneers of the Gospel were the Apostles--their captainwas Jesus, the Redeemer, Himself."" 既然我自己也贫穷卑微，我只能向你提供贫穷卑微的工作，你甚至可能认为这很低俗--因为我现在知道你的举止属于世人所说的高雅；你的情趣倾向于理想化；你所交往的至少是受过教育的人，--但我认为凡是有益于人类进步的工作都不能说低俗。越是贫瘠和没有开垦的土地，基督教徒越是要承担去那儿开垦的使命一一他的劳动所挣得的报酬越少，他的荣誉就越高。在这种情况下，他的命运就是先驱者的命运，传播福音的第一批先驱者就是使徒们--他们的首领就是耶稣，他本人就是救世主。"
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